It seems to always hold true that whatever you endeavor to teach on from the Word of God will become an obvious issue for you.

I don’t know if it’s because I’m thinking about anger and therefore am more aware of my own, or if I’m just distracted, or if God is working on this particular area for me (most likely all of the above!), but I have found myself being impatient and easily angered as a mommy lately. Remember the Elmo underwear? I seem to have to learn this over and over again!

This morning on our way back from Walmart, I was listening to Nancy Leigh DeMoss on her radio program, Revive our Hearts. She has been doing a series on the “Beauty of Meekness,” and I thought what she had to say answered a lot of the issues raised in our past posts on anger, and it resonated with me personally, as well. You can read the entire transcript of her program today here; I’m going to quote some excerpts that were particularly applicable to our prior discussions today. (All emphasis, bolding, etc. are mine)

Meekness, according to Matthew Henry, deals with and relates to our feelings of anger. Meekness has to do with how we handle those feelings of anger. He says it doesn’t totally eradicate anger because sometimes there is justified biblical occasion for anger, but the function of meekness is to direct and control our anger so that we may be angry and sin not, as we’re told in… Ephesians 4:26: “Be angry and sin not.”

So it’s meekness that puts a bridle on our anger and helps us to be angry in appropriate ways without it turning to sin.

Henry points out in his book that meekness enables us to govern or control our anger when we are provoked by others. In that sense, meekness is like a bridle.

How does this work?

A spirit of meekness causes us to stop and think before we react…

Matthew Henry says,

Let meekness stand sentinel [let it be a guard over your heart and your tongue in your responses], and upon the advance of a provocation [when we are provoked] let us examine who it is that we are about to be angry with, and for what. What are the merits of the cause . . . what are likely to be the consequences of our resentments, and what harm will it be if we stifle them, and let them go no further?

So he’s saying meekness stands like a guard. Before you let out all this stuff, before you spew, before you say the words to your husband or your kids: “Why did you . . . Why can’t you . . . I can’t believe you . . .” Before any of that comes out, you stop and you think: “Who am I talking to? This is my husband. He is not my enemy. This is my child that God gave to me. I love this child.” Or, “This is a person who was created in the image of God.” You just stop and think, “Who am I going to talk to?” And you think, “What did that person do?”…

…Henry goes on to say,

Don’t let your displeasure against the [injustices] of another cause you to put your own soul into a hurry. Meekness is the grace which preserves a man master of himself.

That’s what keeps you in control under the control of the Holy Spirit of God… meekness causes us to stop and think before reacting.

Then Matthew Henry points out that, “Meekness will curb the tongue and keep the mouth as with a bridle when the heart is hot.” …He says, “Even when we are called to rebuke others sharply …yet meekness forbids all fury and indecency of language, and everything that sounds like ‘clamor and evil speaking.’”

I know that it is true for me, and it seems to be true for most people, that most of my ungodly anger stems from pride. Big, ugly, monstrous pride. Someone has inconvenienced me, wronged me, stepped on my “rights” or my overly inflated view of my importance.

Meekness and humility go hand in hand. It is a humility before God, acknowledging that He is sovereign over all [remember, all forms of complaining are small acts of rebellion against Him!]. It is also a humility before others, putting their needs ahead of our own, seeking to serve rather than to overpower, giving up the desire to retaliate when we are wronged.

True humility, true meekness, will bridle our anger and stand sentinel over our tongues and reactions.

So, this afternoon as I work on my “big, important adult tasks” and my daughter constantly “interrupts” me, wanting me to hold her, or play with her, or turn off the tv, or give her a snack… shall I be angry and impatient with her, letting my tongue and tone wound her when she has done nothing wrong? What if she does disobey – in my discipline, am I angrily reacting to how her behavior has affected me, or am I meekly and lovingly teaching her to do what is right? I hope that I am not the only one who feels 2″ tall as I read that.

Interesting that as we parent and disciple our children, God disciples us! Lord, you truly are slow to anger and abounding in lovingkindness – make us more like You!

A man’s discretion makes him slow to anger, And it is his glory to overlook a transgression.
Proverbs 19:11