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Showing posts from June, 2018

When all we have is a question mark

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I’ve been wrestling some things through with the Lord. And at the same time I’ve been wrestling through the book of Romans. To be completely honest, Romans, like God’s plan, sometimes feels like familiar ground... and sometimes feels dry and never ending... and sometimes feels confusing.

I circle big question marks in the margins of my notes. Sometimes I write out a prayer at the end- Lord, I’m just not getting this. This is not sinking in. I need You to help me sync with Your thoughts and heart here because I don’t get it. I don’t FEEL it.

This is the prayer not only of my study of Romans but of our life at this moment in time. A circled question mark. An honest “what?!” in the margins of my mind.

And then Jesus and I came to Romans 11:33-36 today. This seems to be the answer He keeps giving me in different ways to my marginal wonderings. Today was so clear.

“Oh, the depthof the richesand wisdomand knowledge of God!How unsearchable are his judgmentsand how inscrutable his ways!.“For who …

Dear mom who's feeling "magical summer" pressure

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My house is quiet right now. My kids were at work with me this morning, we grabbed lunch and groceries, and now the boys are playing with legos and my daughter is reading. It’s gently raining outside. The windows are open and my dog is asleep at my feet.

Today is not a magical summer day. There are no adventures. Our calendar is much calmer this year, and for a few moments today, I began to feel guilty about that. Sometimes it’s hard to resist the social mantra that tells me that I need to make summer magical. Make a bucket list. Go on adventures and have planned fun everyday. I’ve tried that in the past - I just end up tired, my kids end up tired and dependent on me to tell them how to have fun.

Enough.

Summer was magical when I was a kid because of the possibilities held in hours of unstructured time. Things to imagine. Books to read. Cookies and bread to learn to bake. (Even) TV to watch. Of course I loved swimming, and an occasional family vacation (usually to see extended family). B…