March 13th, 2012 by Kristi Stephens

Image from sippakorn via freedigitalphotos.net

I’m a bit of a germ-o-phoebe.

The waiting room at the pediatrician’s office (not to mention the exam room) makes my skin crawl a bit. Shopping carts, door handles, money, serving utensils in a buffet line… I can’t think about them too much. The kids know the drill the moment we walk through the door from any kind of errand – “take off your shoes, wash your hands! STAT!”

We know that contagions are all around us, lurking on surfaces, hands, even in the air. But there is a spiritual contagion that is even more subtle, even more easily passed. You can be innocently sitting alone in a sterile environment and catch it through a status update on the screen of your phone.

Complaining. This contagion can be deadly.

It started with the craving. The camp was filled with the sound of “the people weeping throughout their clans, everyone at the door of his tent.” – Numbers 11:10 They rejected God’s provision for their daily sustenance and craved more – they chose to believe that He was not enough. The result of their soul-sickness? Death. Graves of craving.

Unfortunately, the contagion continued to spread. Even the leadership was not immune.

“Miriam and Aaron spoke against Moses because of the Cushite woman whom he had married, for he had married a Cushite woman. And they said, “Has the Lord indeed spoken only through Moses? Has he not spoken through us also?” – Numbers 12:1-2, ESV

Miriam and Aaron rejected God’s sovereignly appointed leader and craved more power for themselves. The result of their soul-sickness? Miriam found herself covered with leprosy, excluded from the camp even after she was healed.

The epidemic continued to spread further as the twelve returned from surveying the land.

“Then all the congregation raised a loud cry, and the people wept that night. And all the people of Israel grumbled against Moses and Aaron. The whole congregation said to them, “Would that we had died in the land of Egypt! Or would that we had died in this wilderness! Why is the Lord bringing us into this land, to fall by the sword? Our wives and our little ones will become a prey. Would it not be better for us to go back to Egypt?”” – Numbers 14:1-3, ESV

Except for Joshua and Caleb, the people rejected God’s plan entirely and refused to believe that He was powerful enough, faithful enough to keep His word. The result of their soul-sickness? Forty years of wilderness wanderings, waiting for the entire infected generation to die out.

Even still, this was not the end of the epidemic of complaint.

“And they rose up before Moses, with a number of the people of Israel, 250 chiefs of the congregation, chosen from the assembly, well-known men. They assembled themselves together against Moses and against Aaron and said to them, “You have gone too far! For all in the congregation are holy, every one of them, and the Lord is among them. Why then do you exalt yourselves above the assembly of the Lord?”” – Numbers 16:2-3, ESV

Well known chiefs and leaders within the camp rejected the influence God had given them and craved the influence He had given to Moses instead. The results? Some were swallowed by the earth, some were consumed by fire.

Being redeemed out of slavery was not enough.

Being supernaturally cared for in the wilderness was not enough.

Being led each day by the presence of God Himself in the pillar of fire and the cloud of His glory was not enough.

They craved more. They wanted power. They wanted influence. They wanted God’s plan to be more comfortable, more convenient, more gratifying to their own egos. Their hearts were hardened and stubborn as they refused to submit to God’s sovereign hand. Their souls were sick and their faith was withering away – and the main symptom of this sickness was complaining.

We tend to look at complaining as a harmless pastime that we all engage in from time to time (or perhaps all the time.) But it is a serious symptom of a life-threatening illness that eats away silently at our souls.

Complaining is, plain and simple, a symptom of rejecting God and His plan.

His plans for my health.

His plans for the weather.

His plans for the events of my day.

If my God is sovereign, my choice to complain is a choice to rebel. It is no small thing. It can gnaw away at me from the inside out and spread alarmingly fast to those around me at the same time. I can choose words of death or words of life, affirming God’s sovereignty, affirming my trust, speaking truth.

Oh, that we would choose life!

“Therefore, my dear friends, as you have always obeyed—not only in my presence, but now much more in my absence—continue to work out your salvation with fear and trembling, for it is God who works in you to will and to act according to his good purpose.  Do everything without complaining or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation, in which you shine like stars in the universe as you hold out the word of life—in order that I may boast on the day of Christ that I did not run or labor for nothing.” – Philippians 2:12-16, NIV

May 27th, 2011 by Kristi Stephens

Image via Wikipedia

All this week we’ve been considering some questions to ponder before we post/ tweet/ update/ share/ publish -

• We asked ourselves WHO our words are about – who are we bringing glory to?
• We took an honest look at WHAT our words really are – we need to stop fooling ourselves, and see sin for what it really is.
• We paused to ask HOW we should say what we say, and thought about what it means to submit ourselves (and our personalities) to one another out of reverence for Christ in this fast-paced digital age.
• On Wednesday, Julie Sanders shared her favorite post from KristiStephens.com over at Scripture Dig. That post was all about something I call Emotional Modesty – having proper boundaries and appropriate degrees of intimacy with people in our lives, especially online. I would say that Emotional Modesty is considering WHERE we share our words.

Now today – WHY? Why are we driven to communicate? If we had a Biblical purpose statement for our words, a theology of speech… what would it be?

Our words matter. Words communicate something. To the Christian, communication is a high calling.

We serve a God who created Adam and Eve and didn’t just leave them to do their thing and be happy without Him – He walked with them in the garden and talked with them! (Genesis 3:8-10) Even when His creatures turned their backs on Him, He was constantly communicating – building relationships (Genesis 5:22, 6:9), creating covenants (Genesis 12:1-3), revealing Himself (Exodus 3:14), giving laws (Exodus 20), sending prophets (Isaiah 6:8), inspiring the written Scriptures (2 Peter 1:20-21). Eventually God the Son wrapped Himself in flesh and He Himself was called The Word (John 1:1)- the ultimate communication (Hebrews 1:1-3), for to know the Son was to know the Father (John 14:6-10).

We were made in the image of a God who communicates. And He has sent us to communicate. We were commissioned and sent with a message – a message not about us, our daily mundane activities, our likes and dislikes, what we had for lunch – we have been sent with a message about our great God who created us, loves us, offers to save us, invites us; a message about what is truth in a world full of lies, a message of hope in a world falling apart under sin and the curse and hurtling toward certain judgment (Matthew 28:18-20).

Our words matter.

Living in our digital world makes our words cheap and easy. It takes next to no effort to send out our words to dozens, hundreds, or even thousands of people. Right now there are over 1800 people following me on twitter. What if I thought about that number as actual people? A huge auditorium filled with 1800 people – would I stand up, boldly approach the microphone, and announce that I’m having scrambled eggs for lunch?

God has given you a platform. He has given me a platform. Your “reach” might be bigger or smaller than mine, but our purpose should be one and the same if we know the Lord Jesus Christ. Am I using my words with purpose? Am I logging on each day not just seeking to make myself known, but to make Him known? Do I really believe deep down that God has purposed for me to be born in this time, in this place, be given an education, taught how to read, how to communicate my thoughts in the written word, and have access to thousands of people each and every day by pushing one button on my laptop… do I believe that all of this is so that I can tell the world about what happened on American Idol and what I’m making for lunch?

Now, I do want to say: we are not one dimensional people. My days are consumed with my husband and my children and homemaking and ministry. There is nothing wrong with talking about these things online. BUT – if we solemnly consider the eternal purpose for our lives, the fact that we are sent as ambassadors for a God who has communicated to us and sent us to communicate Him to our world… wouldn’t that change the majority of what we say?

WHO are you talking about today? WHAT are your words, if you really boil it down? HOW should you say it? WHERE should you share it? …and ultimately, WHY are you here and communicating, anyway?

Someday I will give an account. You will give an account. O Lord, may you find us faithful.

But I tell you that men will have to give account on the day of judgment for every careless word they have spoken.

Matthew 12:36

May 25th, 2011 by Kristi Stephens

All this week the Scripture Dig team is sharing their favorite posts from KristiStephens.com Today Julie is sharing one that is very close to my heart and a topic I refer to often – Guarding our Emotional Modesty online. It’s an important topic and goes along perfectly with what we’ve been discussing this week. Join us at Scripture Dig for a little extra encouragement in navigating social media!

I wonder how many times I’ve sent an email and wished I could take it back? Or posted a facebook update or responded to someone else’s comment and then went back to delete it? {am I the only one who loves that little “x”?} Or sent a tweet and then literally hit my knees, knowing that what I had said was wrong and there was just no taking it back?

Seriously. I’m not writing this series because I have it all figured out – we tend to write about what God has been tapping our hearts about, yes?

How much regret, how much pain, how much lasting damage would we avoid if we stopped one second to think: HOW? How should I say this? How might someone else read this? How might this come across to someone who is already broken and bleeding? HOW?

To be brutally honest, this question sometimes annoys me. In my sinful selfishness where the world revolves around me and my opinions, I want to respond to my own list of questions above with, “I’m just being myself. If they can’t give me some grace and the benefit of the doubt, then they’re in the wrong. Am I not allowed to have a sense of humor?”

Asking HOW requires that I think of someone other than myself. Asking HOW demands humility, recognizing that the world does not revolve around me and my opinions. Asking HOW means that just because I have an opinion, it should not necessarily be shared. Asking HOW means that I must consider that those on the other side of the screen may be fragile and broken – and while the truth is offensive, there is no excuse for ME being offensive in callousness and sin. Asking HOW means that I must think before I speak.

Do you see a man who speaks in haste?
There is more hope for a fool than for him.

Proverbs 29:20

My husband and I often laugh about the fact that those who know me primarily as a blogger, Bible teacher, or lay leader in our church frequently don’t realize the other facets of my personality. So, for those who don’t know the “other sides” of me – I tend to be sarcastic. I like ironic humor. I enjoy and appreciate quick and witty words. I love having a quick comeback. {And you probably already have picked up on the fact that I have some strong opinions, too!}

This is tricky… because not only can people who know me and interact with me in person be taken off guard by the other sides of my personality, it often doesn’t come across well at all online. While my husband and my best friends I have known for half my life would instantly know the intonation of my voice when I post that biting statement on facebook… the people who don’t know me well won’t understand at all.

Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.

Ephesians 5:21

You see, even if I intend no harm in my comment – submitting my will to others means that I MUST ask myself HOW – I must consider how {and even if!} I should say what I want to say. I must ponder how my words will come across to those on the other side of the computer.

Whether or not people fully know and appreciate ME is of no matter in comparison to whether people know Christ. No one is going to reach heaven and find themselves asking, “did I really know Kristi as well as I could have? Did I fully appreciate her witty humor?” If my words may be a stumbling block – I must lay them down.

Living humbly with one another in this digital world means that even now – perhaps especially now – we must submit ourselves (and our personalities) to one another out of reverence for Christ.

It’s a tough question, but one I think we all must ask. It’s a humbling question. How will HOW influence what words you post online today?

This post is a third in a series of questions to ask ourselves about the power of our words in social media. These posts are part of a larger series on Biblical principles for our speech through the month of May – you can find all of these “One Small Spark” posts indexed here.

May 24th, 2011 by Kristi Stephens

Yesterday, we began focusing on the power of our speech in social media, beginning a series of 5 questions to ponder before we hit “send,” “share,” “tweet,” or “publish.” Yesterday’s question: WHO is this really about?

Today’s question: WHAT are my words?

You see, I am a master at deceiving myself. I’m betting you are, too. We are so good at rationalizing inside our own heads, protecting ourselves from guilt and shame with thick walls of denial and blame, recasting our sin in flowery words that makes it seem much more acceptable to us.

We need to stop fooling ourselves.

So today, WHAT will I post/ tweet/ update/ share? So many of our online words are sin, plain and simple. Just a few frequent areas of sinful speech that are found everywhere online, even from very outspoken Christians:

Boasting:

Let another praise you, and not your own mouth; someone else, and not your own lips.

Proverbs 27:2

{Are we praising ourselves, or are we pointing others to God?}

Gossip:

A perverse man stirs up dissension,
and a gossip separates close friends.

Proverbs 16:28

As charcoal to embers and as wood to fire,
so is a quarrelsome man for kindling strife.

Proverbs 26:21

{Are we stirring up quarrels with our words? Are we purposely saying things to provoke, to cause division, to create strife and argument? Are those around us closer friends because of us, or are we causing rifts and sparking quarrels?}

Disrespect of authorities:

Everyone must submit himself to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which God has established. The authorities that exist have been established by God.

Romans 13:1

Show proper respect to everyone: Love the brotherhood of believers, fear God, honor the king.

1 Peter 3:17

{You might vehemently disagree with our governing authorities. You might have good reason to – Biblical reason to. But there is a difference between respectfully voicing a dissenting opinion and slandering, attacking, and refusing to show respect for those in positions of authority over us.}

Complaining:

“Do everything {ev.er.y.thing!}

without complaining or arguing, {even when it has rained for 35 days straight, your hair is frizzy, and your car had a flat tire!}

so that you may become blameless and pure, {apparently, not complaining is part of our sanctification!}

children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation,{we should be different from our culture!}

in which you shine like stars in the universe as you hold out the word of life— {not complaining actually makes us stand out for Christ!}

in order that I may boast on the day of Christ that I did not run or labor for nothing.”

Philippians 2:14-16

Today, as you open that facebook page or twitter – pause.

• Who are your words consistently about, who are they bringing praise to?
• What are your words, really? Take away the flowery self-deception and creative labeling. Take away the excuses that float to the surface about who has wronged you or how others have provoked you – are you sinning with your speech?

We need to do more than bite our tongues or close the laptop. We need to repent, friends. The small sparks of our words {whether spoken or typed!} can cause lasting damage. Eternal damage.

Lord, we are a people of unclean lips. Reveal to us our sin – teach us to repent. Redeem our words and fill our mouths with praise.

O Lord, open my lips, and my mouth will declare your praise.
You do not delight in sacrifice, or I would bring it; you do not take pleasure in burnt offerings.

The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit;
a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise.

Psalm 51:15-17