March 9th, 2012 by Kristi Stephens

While the meat was yet between their teeth, before it was consumed, the anger of the Lord was kindled against the people, and the Lord struck down the people with a very great plague. Therefore the name of that place was called Kibroth-hattaavah, because there they buried the people who had the craving.

Numbers 11:33-34, ESV

Kibroth-hattaavah: Graves of Craving.

The passage punched me unexpectedly in the stomach – isn’t that where most of my cravings begin?

God had dramatically rescued His people from slavery in Egypt – He had remembered them, seen them, and literally had moved heaven and earth to make their way to freedom. Every day He had abundantly, supernaturally provided for his people through the wilderness. He had step-by-step introduced Himself to His people – the All-Powerful and Ever-Faithful I AM, the King of kings and Lord of lords, Jehovah Rapha – the Lord who Heals, Jehovah Nissi – the Lord Your Banner, Jehovah Mekeddeshem – the Lord who Sanctifies You, the gracious and compassionate God, the God of consuming holiness, the God who is jealous for our worship.

He was enough. He is always more than enough.

But they wanted more.

Now the rabble that was among them had a strong craving. And the people of Israel also wept again and said, “Oh that we had meat to eat! We remember the fish we ate in Egypt that cost nothing, the cucumbers, the melons, the leeks, the onions, and the garlic. But now our strength is dried up, and there is nothing at all but this manna to look at.”

Numbers 11:4-6, ESV

Suffering in slavery suddenly sounded better than freedom in the wilderness. They decided in their hearts that God was not enough – what He supernaturally provided for them was not enough.

Their craving for more was, in essence, a rejection of God Himself. It was a craving that sent them to their graves.

We all crave. We all have had something we relied on, clung to, longed for even more than God – the I AM, the One who freed us from bondage, the One who heals us, the One who sanctifies us, the One who fights for us – Himself. Food, control, money, sugar, caffeine, recognition, blog hits, shopping, the cessation of pain, facebook interactions… the temporal and tangible are seated on the throne of our lives as we turn to them for comfort, significance, provision, peace.

The dangerous truth is that something must die. I either have to kill my craving, or it will kill me. Cravings can kill us physically, emotionally, spiritually. We must conquer them or be conquered.

Kibroth-hattaavah: Graves of Craving.

When we fast, we declare war on our cravings in the name of Jesus, the rightful King of our hearts. We consciously choose to trust that God is enough, that He is all we need. We look at comfort foods in the light of truth and see that food cannot comfort our souls. We look hard at our relational patterns and see if we are turning to others to fill longings in our souls that only God can truly see and satisfy. Fasting is a daily battle to get a strangle-hold on our cravings and throw them down from the throne of our hearts, again and again, and believe that God is enough.

Something will be left in Kibroth-hattaavah, the Grave of Craving. I don’t want it to be me.

Lord, teach us to love you more than anything else – to die to what seeks to kill and enslave us and celebrate the freedom and life you have freely given.

You are more than enough.

You are always enough.

Come, we have nothing else, God – and having you we want for nothing. – Shaun Groves

March 11th, 2011 by Kristi Stephens

{This was originally posted in March of 2009.}

As I mentioned in Lent, Fasting, and Other Outlandish Ideas, I am fairly new to the world of fasting and incorporating this spiritual discipline into my walk with the Lord.

I said in that aforementioned post that Richard Foster points out that fasting reveals what controls us. I must attest that this is true! I was thinking this morning that the I fast are often the roughest with my children. They’re irritable, I’m irritable, it’s often not a pretty sight. It’s hard not to get short with them when they’re following me around wining that they want a snack (after eating a whole bowl of something or another); I either catch myself eating a handful of something with them without thinking about it (Arg!) or somehow begrudge them that graham cracker as I hand it over!

I know that food is more than a survival necessity for me (unlike my husband, who doesn’t really care about eating. Seriously!) I eat when I’m bored, I eat when I’m frustrated, I eat when I’m lonely or sad… somehow we seem to use food to stuff down emotion. I often remark when we watch Biggest Loser that the trainers have to also be half-therapists for the amount of counseling they end up doing at the gym! Take away our comfort food and push us outside of what we feel capable of, and we lose it – all those emotions that we’ve expertly stuffed for so long are raw and exposed!

I’m realizing that, in a less dramatic way, fasting does this for me. When I get frustrated with the kids or start feeling trapped in the house, what do I do? Grab a snack. If I’m concerned about something or upset, what do I do? Grab a snack! Take away my snacks, and I get irritable! Not only am I hungry, but now I’m just stuck with my irritation and upsetting emotion with nothing to stuff it down with!

I had already been thinking about this today and then came across one of my favorite Psalms during my devotional time; this has always been a special passage to me, but it means even more with this framework of where my satisfaction and comfort is coming from.

O God, you are my God,
earnestly I seek you;
my soul thirsts for you,
my body longs for you,
in a dry and weary land
where there is no water.
I have seen you in the sanctuary
and beheld your power and your glory.
Because your love is better than life,
my lips will glorify you.
I will praise you as long as I live,
and in your name I will lift up my hands.
My soul will be satisfied as with the richest of foods;
with singing lips my mouth will praise you.
Psalm 63:1-5

How often do I come to a place of realizing that I am empty and incapable, and instead of realizing that the hunger in my soul is for God, I stuff a cracker in my mouth? When I am emptied of myself, do I long for His the comfort of His presence, or for an oreo as my comfort food?

Obviously physically our bodies need food and water to survive. But are we eating to satisfy legitimate physical hunger, or are we masking the symptoms of spiritual longings for His presence? Only God can satisfy our soul “as with the richest of foods.”

How blessed is the one whom You choose and bring near to You
To dwell in Your courts
We will be satisfied with the goodness of Your house,
Your holy temple.
Psalm 65:4 (NASB)

*Picture from wikipedia.org

March 9th, 2011 by Kristi Stephens

{This is a repost from 2010 – it seemed appropriate to share it again today as Lent begins and I pull our box out once again.}

If you were around these parts in years past, you know how passionately I feel about refocusing on Easter.

The resurrection is central to everything!  I want to make sure that it is not overshadowed by Christmas – truthfully, even Valentines Day and 4th of July often get more emphasis than this – the day looked forward to in Scripture all the way from Genesis 3 – the day that changed eternity.

Last year was my first experience with truly implementing fasting during lent, and we even celebrated our first family seder. {It got better in 2010!} :)

It was a start.

This year I am determined to make the most of this season.  I am determined to make it a worshipful, celebrated, rich time of teaching and reflection for my family – as much as is within my power, of course!  So, when I saw Ann Voskamp’s post about a Box of Repentances for Lent (sent to me courtesy of my friend Nikki, who said she knew I would love it!), it had my name all over it.

Today I made ours.

It’s just a simple paper mache box, decoupaged with scrapbook paper and wound tight with twine.  The nail and verse were added to keep our focus on what this truly is all about.

A small stack of 3×5 cards, cut in half, sit next to the box.  Each day, as individuals, we will write the confessions of sin for that day.

Some will be big.
Some will be small.
All are sin.
All are paid for in the blood of Jesus Christ.

On Good Friday, we are planning to burn these cards as a vivid reminder, to both us and our children, that the ultimate price has been paid for our debt of sin – the record has been wiped clean, and we are truly free.

We’re talking about doing this with our small group on Good Friday. What a powerful time to reflect together on the sacrifice of Christ on our behalf!

Do you have any special traditions you use to focus on the significance of Easter?

July 14th, 2010 by Kristi Stephens

Over at Scripture Dig we are taking turns sharing a peek into what our quiet time routines look like.  And friends, I’m going to be very honest with you here… my time is not as routine as I would love it to be!

The question of how to fit in time with the Word is a discussion I often find myself having with other young moms.  So, if you’d like a peek into my reality of how I do it (and what I’m learning to do!), click over to Scripture Dig… and let’s get real. :)